Photographs
by melanie39
Summary: Ryan asks something of Kirsten.


I've been thinking alot lately about Ryan's reactions after Marissa died. This (and the scene where Ryan throws away Marissa's photographs) inspired this.

**Photographs**

_September 2007_

"That's it, I think…"

Kirsten looked up from the pile of photographs and smiled at Ryan.

"Oh, great. Did you put all the boxes in the porch way?"

"Yep, the pool house is now just an empty shell. Actually, it's not even that since it has no windows."

Kirsten looked apologetic.

"I'm so sorry we didn't find a place with another pool house, Ryan."

"Hey, you're moving to Berkeley. I get to have you all close by. If I had the choice between a pool house in Newport and an ordinary room in Berkeley, I know which I'd take."

Kirsten smiled fondly at the sheepish face that followed this unusual outburst of honesty. She had worried about Ryan adjusting. She knew he liked the pool house. She knew this moving out thing had hit him harder than Seth. Seth had always wanted to get away from Newport and the "pod people" but for Ryan, Kirsten knew, this was the first real home he'd ever had; at least the first home where he'd been able to be a normal kid.

She and Sandy had discussed the wisdom of moving to Berkeley late into the night after the boys had presented them with their plan, aided by the previous owners. They both loved the idea for themselves, but they weren't so sure it was the best thing for Ryan or Seth. Moving right when they were both heading off to college was not the greatest timing. Ryan, in particular they felt, needed the security and familiarity of home to return to. Even if he didn't spell it out and they all skirted around the issue, there was no getting away from the fact that Ryan had originally intended to be going to college with Marissa.

They had wrestled with their decision over several days before finally deciding, after weighing the pros and cons, that being there on his doorstep, albeit in a strange house, was going to be more support to him than being several hundred miles away in Newport.

Kirsten picked up the last bunch of photos and placed them neatly in the box in front of her.

"Well, if you're done, come and help me shut these boxes and tape them shut."

Obediently Ryan joined her, kneeling on the floor and picking up the parcel tape. He couldn't resist delving into the contents before shutting the box.

"Wow, this is Seth?"

He peered at a small Polaroid of a baby, all pink and purple and scrunched up.

Kirsten snatched it from him with a smile.

"Now don't let him know you saw that. He'll never forgive me. But yes, that's just how he looked a few hours after he was born." Her voice was wistful.

"I was a lot better looking at that age," Ryan commented, and they both laughed.

He picked up the next picture from the top of the pile as Kirsten rolled her eyes.

"Ryan, we'll never get this done if you…." She stopped when she saw his face.

She slid next to him wordlessly.

"You both look so young there," she commented quietly as she leaned over his shoulder.

Ryan nodded, his eyes fixed.

"Kirsten, would you mind getting me a copy of this?"

Kirsten was puzzled.

"Of course, but I thought I already gave you…"

She didn't say any more. Ryan had that look on his face. That look that said "I've said all I'm going to say so please don't ask me to say any more" look. Kirsten had seen that look too many times to finish her sentence.

_Christmas Eve 2007_

Kirsten placed the baby on a rug in front of the tree and settled down with her family. After a pre Chrismukkah lunch, Summer had headed off to Seattle to spend Christmas with her father. Taylor had begun the six-hour drive down to Santa Barbara where her mother was staying at a spa and had unexpectedly invited her to join her. So it was just the five of them, the first time they'd been alone since the boys had come home from college.

Seth sat under the tree and pouted.

"Ryan has more gifts than me."

Sandy laughed.

"I told you, honey. There's no flies on this kid."

Kirsten put on her best "I'm your mother and you'd better shut up" look.

"Ryan has one more gift than you because there was something that he asked me for a little while ago and I've only just managed to get it. I just figured I might as well wrap it up and give it to him tonight. If you like, I'll go and wrap you up a can of soda just so it's even."

Ryan grinned at Kirsten's patronizing tone and couldn't resist a quick pretend sorrowful glance at Seth.

Seth scowled back.

Kirsten turned to Ryan.

"Actually, you may prefer to open this gift on your own. Some people are just too nosy."

Ryan nodded, slightly bemused, and tucked the small parcel behind him.

"I picked a small album so that you could tuck it away easily."

Ryan looked up at Kirsten from his bed.

"It's awesome." His voice was quiet.

"I made the same for Kaitlin and Julie. I don't think even Julie has seen some of those pictures before."

"They're going to love them."

"It doesn't upset you? I thought it might. I wasn't sure." Kirsten was hesitant. "I placed that gift under the tree a million times and kept taking it away."

"I think it's beautiful."

She nodded, pleased.

"Well, I'm glad you like it. Good night, sweetheart."

Kirsten shut the door softly and walked down the hallway. She was relieved, and glad, that the five hours she'd spent last month picking out every photograph she and Sandy had ever taken of Marissa Cooper was time well spent.

Ryan turned the pages once more from the beginning before stowing it away in his closet alongside his grey hoodie and the Harbor sweatshirt Taylor had no idea he had, and switched off his night light.

The End


End file.
